Fasting 101

(These are just some jotted ideas in my head that will make as much of a connection as the illogical word placement of this long sentence!) Some of you know and some of you don't! I am fasting for my back...Not in a spiritual way, although it couldn't hurt, but in a medical way. My doctors have come to a drastic decision, that I agreed to, that we would drop some pounds quickly to try and avoid a disk fragmentation in my back. If you have known me in the past seven years you know I have had extreme back issues including 3 surgeries involving 3 disk levels in my lower back requiring disk repair and removal of portions. It makes me sad to know I was 5'8" and now on a good day I am 5'7". So back to my fasting...It's only been two days, but I feel like I am sucking down more sugar than I ever have in my life. What do I mean by that? Optifast...It's like Slimfast only its medically followed by a physician, a nutritional coach, counseler, physical educator, group sessions, and a ton of lab work. These shakes, bars and soups are my only food source for three months! Vanilla, Chocolate, Strawberry, Peanut Butter, Oat & Honey, Garden Tomato, and Chicken Noodle. Do you think it is possible to survive on Vanilla, Tomato, and Peanut Butter? Those are the only flavors that I like right now. Four shakes, a bar, and a soup a day...Just 980 calories...Scary isn't it?! Who in their right mind would do this? Someone who hurts so bad that they would do anything to make it better. Most people on this fast have high cholesterol, high blood pressure, and diabetes...I surprised the program coordinator because I have none of these, I am not severely obese, and I was walking on my own the day I met her. I saw another person on this program and it was grim! Sure I have some post pregnancy weight left behind from the second pregnancy, but who has an easy time loosing it when they have major health issues including six months of bed rest and a husband that only made food with a deep fryer?! I was blessed to have lost 25 lbs total after not gaining with the third pregnancy. So how did it come to such extremes...A neurosurgeon that said drop 20lbs in six weeks and we'll see how you feel...Like I haven't tried? 20lbs in six weeks...Yes because I have a magic wand!...20lbs in six weeks...Well no I feel motivated...20 lbs in six weeks...No it doesn't help to keep repeating it, just thought it might. So far I have missed food...So much so that I now want to lick my fingers as I make dinner! I did cheat on the diet by licking my hand after I grated extra sharp cheddar cheese for beef enchiladas...They looked so good...it was worth the lick, but today I want more! I would love to eat a chocolate covered something...So far I have resisted...So far I have not looked at them too much...Maybe if I could go to sleep I would stop thinking about them...maybe putting extra punctuation in here will help with the want I am feeling...Nope, not working! Did anyone realize that 100 fluid ounces of water is a lot? Added to a mostly liquid diet...I feel like I can't even leave the house now. So I still have 12 weeks until I can add a meat and veggie back to my diet and up it to 1200 calories if I continue on this very expensive back induced craziness and then a bit more every week after that...I am already dreaming of what I want to eat. This is a one year program and yes I am paying to waste away...Hope it works! Watch my graph at the bottom to see if I can get there...